Ballpark Concessions

So I'm dreaming of the Reds Opening Day and warm afternoons with cold beer, bad food and a great game of baseball in front of me - can you blame me, it's the dead of winter here in Cincinnati. One of my favorite things about going to ball games is the food, nothing taste better than a ball park weenie smothered in mustard and ketchup and so delicately wrapped in the aluminum foil. Of course there are also things like soft serve ice cream, cotton candy, corndogs, popcorn and any other type of concession type food to tempt you.

Well, thanks to my friend Rob I learned last year a stadium in Michigan introduced a heart attack on a plate, the Fifth Third Burger , to their menu. This year they are allowing fans to vote on the next unhealthy item to be added to the menu. All of them sound absolutely disgusting, but the sad part is I could see myself at a game and ordering one of these ridiculous items just because I have to - and then I would end up loving it and having night sweats thinking about the next time I get to indulge in it. I've pulled the items from the West Michigan White Caps website below so you can get a feeling what I'm talking about.

1. Chicken and Waffles - Why did the chicken cross the road? To lie down on a bed of waffles, get smothered in gravy and get eaten by you, of course!
   
2. Chili Mac Tacos - Think comfort food that took a trip to Mexico. Creamy mac and cheese is smothered in chili then loaded into a hard taco shell to create a taste experience that won't soon be forgotten.
   
3. Chocolate Covered Bacon - This little piggy went to market, this little piggy stayed home and this little piggy dunked itself in chocolate to become a delicious treat for Whitecaps fans!


4. Corn Dog o' Plenty - If the Idaho Christmas Tree isn't enough corndog for you then try the Corn Dog o' Plenty. A full half-pound, footlong frank that is battered and deep fried to make one gigantic corn dog.


5. Cudighi Yooper Sandwich - If you don't know what this one is then you haven't been to the Upper Peninsula. Cudighi is a spicy sausage found throughout the U.P. and we might bring it down to West Michigan. A sausage patty, smothered in cheese, pizza sauce, peppers and onions could grace the concession stands of Fifth Third Ballpark.


6. Declaration of Indigestion - When in the course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to disband from the tyranny of healthy eating, they should consume the Declaration of Indigestion. You see, all sandwiches are not created equal as this half-pound, footlong hot dog is covered in a philly cheese steak (steak, cheese, peppers and onions) and served on a gigantic sub roll. It is certainly your unalienable right to consume one of these in the pursuit of happiness.
   
7. Idaho Christmas Tree - Why waste your time eating all of your favorite items separately? This is a batter-dipped hot dog rolled in french fries and deep fried to create the perfect limbed link on stick.
   
8. Poutin - A real treat from North of the border. The French Canadians have done it again, and this time with gravy. Fries, fried cheese curds and gravy make up this delectable side dish. Tres bien!
   
9. The Pink Panther - Not sure if this guy is named after the famous detective or the insulation, but either way it's delicious. Take a hot dog bun, slather it in icing and fill it with pink cotton candy. Maybe drizzle some root beer syrup over the top for good measure. It's the dessert dog you'll have to try this summer!


10. Twinkie Cheese Dog - This dog can survive any disaster and it might cause a few of its own. Simple - a hot dog laid in a Twinkie covered in cheese. Yum.

Ok, did those just make your heart stop reading them? All of them sound just disgusting to me, especially anything that is covered in gravy - NO THANK YOU! The Pink Panther is just disturbing and made my teeth feel like they might fall out from all the sugar. I mean straight Root Beer Syrup, there is a reason it's mixed with carbonated water people!

Now, if I had to choose one item to add to the menu I would pick the Corn Dog O Plenty! I love corndogs, even the cute mini ones that bars now serve. Nothing is gross about this concoction except, it's basically a footlong corndog instead of a footlong cheese coney. However, according to the poll the Declaration of Independence is winning with my Corn Dog receiving a mere 1% of votes.

You can vote here and also be glad that you don't live near West Michigan and will continue to only see normal items on your concession menu that don't require a jump start to your heart after eating them.

Turkey Day

I can't believe Thanksgiving is already here! Like where has the time gone? I guess being so busy at work and traveling that all of a sudden it's here!

Well, Jim and I are having our first Thanksgiving at the house this year so it's pretty exciting but also a little stressful. I've cooked a turkey once in college and it turned out well, but that was college and it also went with a ton of beer and partying!

We are having 8 people over, all Jim's family. I plan to run the Turkey Day Trot and eat breakfast at the Price's all at the same time as starting the prep work! Then, after the meal at our place we head off to my family party around 6 or so (well I head off and Jim will probably join later in the evening just in time for charades with my family)!

I love Thanksgiving - the food, family and talk about Christmas. I imagine this year will be really crazy so I've gone ahead and made an itinerary for myself. So here you have it! The tricky part is we only have 1 oven and I believe in making things from scratch- so I really had to time things out just right for a 3PM arrival and 4PM meal. And oh yeah, I plan to run the Turkey Trot so I don't feel guilty piling the food on my plate. I figure I will run 6 miles in the AM so I can eat some extra calories!

Wednesday

• Set Table


• Make Cranberry Sauce
  

Thursday

• 8AM Turkey Prep & Put in Oven (Tent so no need to baste for 2 hours)


• 8:30AM Turkey Trot


• 9:30AM Breakfast at Price's


• 11AM Turkey Check and remove tent, begin basting


• 11:30AM Make Spinach Dip and cool


• 12 PM Sweet Potato Prep


• 12PM Mashed Potato Prep


• 1:30 PM Stuffing Prep


• 1:30 PM Green Bean Casserole


• 2:30 PM Turkey Check and let sit


• 2:30 PM Put in Stuffing and Green Bean Casserole


• 2:30 Make Gravy


• 3:30 warm items in over for meal at 4PM

Gobble Gobble! May you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Really This Could Make You Fat

Obviously I check out a lot of food blogs and read up on nutritional information as it goes hand in hand with my job. Recently, I came across a a slide show on DailyBeast that was titled :Food That Can Kill You Instantly. It might have been the grossest slide show ever. It was clearly inspired from the website, thisiswhyyourfat.com.

The slide show was pretty gross and I could barely look at some of the food. Clearly people make ridiculous foods for the website just to make sure they get featured, but some of them are for real (check out my previous post on the Heart Attack Grill).

Alright I'm going to admit it here - I don't always eat the healthiest (GASP)! But I work out a ton to eat what I want. I actually chose to feature the McNuggetini from the slide because it sounds delicious! I mean who doesn't like chocolate milkshakes and McNuggets with a little bit of sauce and vodka? I would eat that up! Then probably vomit right after.

In all seriousness, I've started to try to make restaurant version food the healthy way and I'm loving it. I have been pulling the recipes from SparkRecipes and we are currently running a contest so lots have been entered, check them out here. I tried the Crunchy Supreme (knock off of Taco Bell's) for dinner last night and Jim and I both loved it.

If only I could knock off the Chipotle recipe - it just never taste the same:(

A Little Piece of Heaven

Last week I was in Sanibel, Florida for my family vacation. Every year we go to Sanibel for a week to fish, relax, snorkel, drink, eat, bike and much more. We go with our entire family, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Grandparents, etc...each year it can be anywhere from 15-25 people - so the whole Island knows which week we come each year!

For those who haven't been to Sanibel, it's North of Fort Myers and very close to Captiva. Sanibel still has no stop lights, neon lights or chain restaurants on the Island (except Dairy Queen). It is totally removed from reality and every year I'm there it gets better and better.

With 15 people this year we were always on the go. We do our annual fishing trip, which this year landed several sharks, Snapper and a Grouper that was too big to bring in the boat. We also did a snorkeling excursion where some lucky people had the chance to swim with a manatee. We then spend a lot of time at the pool, in the ocean, surf fishing at dusk and pier fishing at night.

We do a lot of eating out and great food - not the healthiest food, but it's vacation so I'm ok with it. We always eat breakfast at the The Lighthouse and Island Cow, which is my favorite breakfast place. They serve these delicious cranberry muffins for free and this year added Funfetti muffins to the mix. The breakfast places are decorated so nice and always have the best juices!

We always eat dinner at Lazy Flamingo and also down a few beers here pretty often. They serve the best steamed shrimp and wings on the island- along with the coldest beer. They also put on Reds games for us when we show up, and this year even the All Star game. We do all you can eat crab legs at McT's, Timber's for the atmosphere and good food, Trader's for Danny Morgan and usually throw in another restaurant here and there, but those four are the staples.

We had a great time and lots of funny stories. I swear, someday someone in our family could write a book with all the crazy things that happen. Between my Uncle bringing home fish and meatballs on the plane to my Grandma requesting no fizz and ice on the side for her pop - we are a lot to handle but always a lot of fun.

I can't wait until next year!

Just Wrong

I recently saw an article that featured controversial foods and was completely grossed out by some of the meals on the list. They were controversial because they were inhumane, almost extinct, deadly and some had such high caloric intakes my heart hurts thinking about it.

One that was on the list was a restaurant in Arizona known as the Heart Attack Grill. This hospital-themed restaurant has dishes loaded with calories and fat and even names them after medical procedures you might end up having if you eat unhealthy or even eat just one of these burgers!!. But they don't even hide the fact that their food is unhealthy. The burgers are named after medical procedures which you would need if you had a heart attack, which you might have if you eat one. On top of that, the waitresses are dressed as nurses!

The burger pictured here, The Quadruple Bypass, weighs in around 2 lbs with lots of mean and loads of cheese and contains a whopping 8,000 calories. I checked out their website and almost cracked up when I got there. The home page totes “Deep Fried in Pure Lard”! That made my stomach hurt thinking about it and my blood just got thicker reading the word lard. Even better, on their homepage they feature Jolt and no filter cigarettes?

So, the website had a blog and some other interesting stuff on it that claimed you can eat, drink and smoke yourself healthy? And their logo is “taste worth dying for.” Seriously, and people support this man? Even worse, if you are over 350 pounds you can eat here for free? Seriously, someone over 350 pounds already has enough issues with their healthy and you are promoting them to become even more unhealthy? The owner of this place should be charged with negligence, we’ve seen stories like this all over the papers recently.

Don't ever eat here, it's not worth it! Your heart, arteries, stomach, butt, lover and whatever else you like will thank you! I can't believe a place like this is even allowed to exist!

Now, don't all scream at once! I'm on vacation next week so it might be a slow week! If you land on this page and wonder where I am, just think Pina Coladas and feet in the sand.

Disaster

We have officially moved!!! Last Saturday we moved into our new house and have since been living in a total disaster zone. They are finishing the bathroom upstairs and the closets, so we have no access to the master bedroom or closets. I can't stand the chaos and how disorganized things are- I'm about to blow up! It literally looks like this. And somehow it's not bothering Jim as much as it's bothering me!

Because of the move we have had to eat out A LOT and I am beginning to feel gross. I can't wait until we have a full functioning kitchen and the ability to make healthy food. While looking up the calorie count for the carry out Chinese we ate last night I came across the grossest food ever!!!

It's from In-N-Out Burger and part of their "not so secret" menu. Basically, if you go to their website and look it up you can find this and if you eat there frequently you know all about it. They have ways to dress your burger and some people have decided that it would be a good idea to dress your fries. So the picture to the right shows what this would consist of: french fries, grilled onions, cheese, thousand island dressing - just GROSS and a heart attack on a plate.

A Train Wreck in Your Arteries

Literally, a Train Wreck in Your Arteries!!

I was at a local establishment on Sunday afternoon to watch some NCAA games and eat the best burger in Cincinnati. Zip’s Café in Mt. Lookout Square is consistently voted as the Best Burger in Cincinnati and I agree. In addition to the burgers, you have to try the chili, grilled cheese and the shoestring fries. Nothing about this screams healthy, but it’s worth it every once in awhile. It’s affordable and way better than Fat Burger!

On Sunday, my friend Stefanie and I noticed that they were advertising a “Train Wreck”. At first we thought maybe the train that circles the restaurant does some fantastic amazing trick and spews alcohol or jumps the track – but we were way far off on that one. The manager/bartender and a friend of mine, Mike, informed us that it is a new sandwich and that the man on the end of the bar just ate one. We were like, well what is it? So here it goes :

• ¼ pound Hamburger


• 1 Mettwurst


• 1 piece of ham


• 3 pieces of cheese


• Lettuce, tomato, onion and pickle


• Ketchup, mustard and mayo


• 1 hamburger bun

Holy Cow – Literally! I mean I couldn’t even get my mouth around this thing to take a bite. My heart skipped a beat just thinking about this sandwich and one of my arteries already panicked at the thought of surgery. This is just absurd and would totally put me on the couch for two weeks.

So, curiosity got the best of me and I had to know how many calories are in this Train Wreck? Well, unfortunately they do not list the contents of their food online – but I used SparkPeople’s Food Tracker to estimate the totals. So, below is how much this puppy sets you back:

• Total Calories = 1,310


• Total Carbs = 83


• Total Fat = 79


• Protein = 68

And this is without the grease that I’m sure is sitting on the grill, butter on the bread etc. That is almost my calories for the day, already exceeds my Fat for the day and is without the fries, chili and other condiments you would add to this meal. YIKES!!!

Zip’s is still awesome and people eat this sort of thing up, it’s just not for me. For another example of an awful food gimmick, check out Rob’s Blog on The Fifth Third Burger.